Monday, June 26, 2017

Dealing with Emotional Abuse

Dealing with Emotional Abuse

Blog Session
June 2017


There are many issues that are not discussed on a regular basis.  However, there are many issues that take place on a regular basis.  Somewhere at this very moment, many people are being emotionally abused; many others are recovering from emotional abuse; and many more are the ones who are the emotional abusers.

Welcome to all New Blog Readers, Followers and Visitors to the Blog . . .

This Blog Session is about Emotional Abuse. Emotional pain often exacts a greater toll on your quality of life than physical pain.  The stress and negative emotions associated with any trying event can even lead to physical pain and disease.  In fact, emotional stress is linked to health problems including chronic inflammation, lowered immune function, increased blood pressure, altered brain chemistry, increased tumor growth and more.

Of course, emotional pain can be so severe that it interferes with your ability to enjoy life and, in extreme cases, may even make you question whether your life is worth living.
Unfortunately, there are many children that go through emotional abuse.  There are children that are bullied by the other children at school, and there are also many children who are bullied by their parents and sometimes teachers at school.
Being Labeled, Called Names, Bullied
How does the above picture make you feel?  Have you experienced what this picture invokes?  How many times have you been called out of your name?
If you can remember incidences from your youth, then those incidents made an impression upon your mind, body, spirit & soul.
Somewhere in your subconscious mind, your memory will regurgitate those awful moments at the most inopportune times.  Someone may have called you "stupid" 30 years ago, and you happen to run into someone at a party who says to you, "you stupid fool."  ~ and oh boy!  That person gets punched in the face because it is what you have always wanted to do to the first person who ever said that to you and made you feel badly about yourself.  Even though the person who says, "you stupid fool." ~ was only kidding and laughing when they said it.  That is how misunderstandings happen. And that is also how hurt feelings rise to the surface.
Many of our Readers here may be in need of Emotional First Aid, or may know someone who needs it.  We're going to get our Journals out for today's Blog Session, and write down five tips for healing your emotional pain . . .
Journal Notes
Healing Emotional Pain

Five Tips for healing your emotional pain:
1)  Let Go of Rejection
Rejection actually activates the same pathways in your brain as physical pain, which is one reason why it hurts so much.  The feeling of rejection toys with your innate need to belong, and is so distressing that it interferes with your ability to think, react, recall memories and make decisions.  The sooner you let go of painful rejections, the better off your mental health will be.
2)  Avoid Ruminating
When you ruminate, or brood, over a past hurt, the memories you replay in your mind only become increasingly distressing and cause more anger, without providing any new insights.  In other words, while reflecting on a painful event can help you to reach an understanding or closure about it, if you are ruminating about it, it simply increases your stress levels, and can actually be addictive.
       Ruminating on a stressful incident can also increase your
       levels of C-reactive protein, a marker of inflammation in
       your body linked to cardiovascular disease.

3)  Turn Failure Into Something Positive
If you allow yourself to feel helpless after a failure, or blame it on your lack of ability or bad luck, it’s likely to lower your self-esteem.  Blaming a failure on specific factors within your control, such as planning and execution, is likely to be less damaging, but even better is focusing on ways you can improve and be better informed or prepared so you can succeed next time (and make sure that you try again, so there is a next time).
4)  Make Sure Guilt Remains a Useful Emotion
Guilt can be beneficial in that it can stop you from doing something that may harm another person (making it a strong "relationship protector").  But guilt that lingers or is excessive can impair your ability to focus and enjoy life.
       If you still feel guilty after apologizing for a wrongdoing, 
       be sure you have expressed empathy toward them and
       conveyed that you understand how your actions impacted
       them.  This will likely lead to authentic forgiveness and 
       relief of your guilty feelings.

5)  Use Self-Affirmations if You Have Low Self-
      Esteem
    
       While positive affirmations are excellent tools for 
       emotional health, if they fall outside the boundaries of 
       your beliefs, they may be ineffective.  This may be the
       case for people with low self-esteem, for whom self-
       affirmations may be more useful.  Self-affirmations, such
       as “I have a great work ethic,” can help to reinforce 
       positive qualities you believe you have, as can making a 
       list of your best qualities.

Embrace Life!

Taking care of your emotional health

Just as eating healthy, exercising and getting a good night’s sleep are habits that must be held to in order to be effective, your emotional health requires ongoing care as well.  And, just like your physical body, your mind can only take so much stress before it breaks down.  Yet many neglect to tend to their emotional health with the same devotion they give to their physical well-being.  This is a mistake, but one that’s easily remedied with the following tips for emotional nurturing . . .

1. Be an Optimist
Looking on the bright side increases your ability to experience happiness in your day-to-day life while helping you cope more effectively with stress.
2. Have Hope
Having hope allows you to see the light at the end of the tunnel, helping you push through even dark, challenging times.  Accomplishing goals, even small ones, can help you to build your level of hope.
3. Accept Yourself
Self-deprecating remarks and thoughts will shroud your mind with negativity and foster increased levels of stress. Seek out and embrace the positive traits of yourself and your life, and avoid measuring your own worth by comparing yourself to those around you.
4. Stay Connected
Having loving and supportive relationships helps you feel connected and accepted, and promote a more positive mood. Intimate relationships help meet your emotional needs, so make it a point to reach out to others to develop and nurture these relationships in your life.
5. Express Gratitude
People who are thankful for what they have are better able to cope with stress, have more positive emotions, and are better able to reach their goals.  The best way to harness the positive power of gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal or list, where you actively write down exactly what you’re grateful for each day.  Doing so has been linked to happier moods, greater optimism and even better physical health.
6. Find Your Purpose and Meaning
When you have a purpose or goal that you’re striving for, your life will take on a new meaning that supports your mental well-being.  If you’re not sure what your purpose is, explore your natural talents and interests to help find it, and also consider your role in intimate relationships and ability to grow spiritually.
7. Master Your Environment
When you have mastery over your environment, you’ve learned how to best modify your unique circumstances for the most emotional balance, which leads to feelings of pride and success.  Mastery entails using skills such as time management and prioritization along with believing in your ability to handle whatever life throws your way.

8. Exercise Regularly
Exercise boosts levels of health-promoting neurochemicals like serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine, which may help buffer some of the effects of stress and also relieve some symptoms of depression.  Rather than viewing exercise as a medical tool to lose weight, prevent disease, and live longer (which are all benefits that occur in the future), try viewing exercise as a daily tool to immediately enhance your frame of mind, reduce stress and feel happier.
9. Practice Mindfulness
Practicing "mindfulness" means that you’re actively paying attention to the moment you’re in right now.  Rather than letting your mind wander, when you’re mindful you’re living in the moment and letting distracting or negative thoughts pass through your mind without getting caught up in their emotional implications.  Mindfulness can help you reduce stress for increased well-being as well as achieve undistracted focus.

Practice Mindfulness

Friends take care of your "self", mind, body & soul.

See you in the next exciting Blog Session!

Peace, Love & Light,

 René


© Copyright - René Allen - JUNE 2017 - All Rights Reserved



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